Newsgroups & Mailing Lists

These statistics would be hilarious if they weren't true

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Q: How many subscribers does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Thousands

1 to change the light bulb and to post to the list that the light bulb has been changed.

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently.

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs.

27 to point out spelling and grammatical errors in posts about changing light bulbs.

53 to flame the spell checkers

156 to write to the list administrator complaining about the light bulb discussion and its inappropriateness to this mail list.

41 to correct spelling in the spelling/grammar flames.

109 to post that this list is not about light bulbs and would they kindly take this email exchange to alt.lite.bulb

203 to demand that cross posting to alt.grammar, alt.spelling and alt.punctuation about changing light bulbs be stopped.

111 to defend the posting to this list saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts **are** relevant to this mail list.

306 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique, and what brands are faulty.

27 to post URLs where one can see examples of different light bulbs

14 to post that the URLs were posted incorrectly, and to post corrected URLs.

3 to post about links they found from the URLs that are relevant to this list which makes light bulbs relevant to this list.

33 to summarize all posts to date, then quote them including all headers and footers, and then add "Me Too."

12 to post to the list that they are unsubscribing because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy.

19 to quote the "Me Too's" to say, "Me Three."

4 to suggest that posters request the light bulb FAQ.

1 to propose new alt.change.lite.bulb newsgroup.

47 to say this is just what alt.physic.cold_fusion was meant for, leave it here.

143 votes for alt.lite.bulb.

27 to post in HTML because they are using the IE or Netscape that had it turned on by default and are too clueless to look

48 to complain about the HTML posts

27 to post 'sorry I didn't realize it was on' -- in HTML

96 to complain about more HTML and post detailed instructions on how to change the setting

58 to mumble something about using a web browser to read mail

12 MIME posts with useless colors and bolds saying thanks for the help with the HTML mail

1 to post a GIF/JPG of the lightbulb hanging too close to his digital camera.

1 complaint from the guy using /usr/ucb/Mail who wants to know what the *@&(%$!@ has been going on

58 to complain about the binary post

74 to say they liked the binary and didn't mind it

1 post about how you can MAKE MONEY FAST!!!!! by selling lightbulbs and this report available for only $5.

1328 to reply to the list with the full spam attached and then put 'remove' at the end

3 to flame the other morons for replying to the spammer and CCing the list

1 from the list admin notifying that the list is looking for a bigger server to handle the load

There have now been several followups:

"How did I get on this list?"

"How do I get off this list?"

"REMOVE"

"REMOVE
UNSUB
SIGNOFF
REMOVE
TAKE ME OFF THIS LIST"

"unsubribe" [sic]

"Morons, you have to send it to the majordomo address"

"How am I supposed to know that?"

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